Use me

*I'm pissed as fuck. The air stills, a freezing bubble surrounding me, animals silencing their chirps and rustling snuffles in the undergrowth as I pass, Jodi's shirt pressed to my nose as I separate out the scents, isolating the male and following the rusty old sweat scent that designates his location. Working on foot is slow, my anger rising with each block, blades in my wrist sheathes more than just a threat, an extension of myself, hilts twitching into my palms, soothing, reassuring as I close the distance, singling out the domicile. To fuck him over in his own home. Yeah...that will do...he hurt someone I cared for....in a place where she thought she could relax ...be safe...and I was going to do the fucking same. Her fault indeed. Well, human, you mess with my family, pieces of you start to go missing. Shrugging my jacket off, my arms, chest and stomach bared, inked porcelain, breasts covered by a silk, embroidered corset, my legs encased painted on leather, thick heeled boots climbing up to my thighs. Seduction.  I am a spider, my looks are my web and this human was going to get good and tangled up in it, so tangled that my razor anger would slice him into tiny little pieces, touch a female without permission  you get me gunning for your ass. Eyes glowing with a supernatural glimmer as I climb the steps to his flat, knocking with a sure yet demure tap of my knuckles. He opens the door with a smirk and I hate him even more. He's on eye level with me, my heels giving me a few inches   and I laugh, raking him with a sneered smile, his baby blond curls and piercings at total odds. Fuck he's young. Bad age to start fucking  with females, barely out of his 20's, would grow to be a full blown dickhead* hey gorgeous, your buddy sent me a little pick me up after   shit the other night can I come in? *the hair swish seals the deal, unable to resist my ass length midnight waves, his drooling jaw drop preludes the frantic ushering of his hand, bidding me enter. My hands flex, spasming in their leather prison, no way in fuck was I touching his skin to do this, wouldn't taint myself with his disgusting corruption. I step into the hovel, my boots crunching crisps and   popcorn into the stained carpet, lip curling while his back is turned, watching him clear the couch of...whatever the fuck was on there. My heel kicks the door closed with an audible slam, all pretenses dropped as I unleash the killer, the animal that loves the pain, feeds off the fear, fangs punching down like ivory knives, my fist a battering ram encased in leather as he turns towards the noise, his nose   giving with a satisfying crunch under the attack* Hey mister...you touched my sister...*the singsong voice dances around the room* and you know when you touch her...you touch me, true...and I don't like to be touched by strangers, you cock sucking thunder ass!! *snarling, my elbow hammering repeatedly into his mulched nose, the bone splintered through his skin* My family...is the most important thing...and you violated one of the most amazing females I have ever met...you made her doubt, fear and be ashamed...and it was all your fault!! *my fangs hover inches from his face as my fist goes in for another hit, his cheekbone blending with fragments of his eyesocket, the bone like pins stabbing through his flesh* you can speak you know...apologise perhaps...I'll pass on the message before I remove your disgusting tongue...*no answer, just the high keening cry of an abusive fucker having the tables turned* You know those two letters? N and O? *my hand spans his throat, hauling him off the ground, his feet dangling as he slowly chokes in my grip* they spell no...and you should respect those   two little letters...no matter who fucking says them, dig? *unsheathing a blade with my free hand and throwing him into the opposite wall the plaster concaving beneath his rag doll impression as his back cracks with spine breaking ferocity into the wall* I love that sound...*his silence however...my anger swirls like a tornado, a red, blinding haze blurring my vision...bloodlust was a good mistress to serve and I willingly submit to her, crossing the small dirthole of an apartment, my blade stabbing through his shoulder and dragging him to a standing, the point burying through bone and impaling him on the wall. Cocking my head to one side* I killed someone else this way but I think death is too merciful...I'll leave you to feel it all...*winking, the razor points of my fangs distorting my voice to a dark purr of evil...rarely do I let this out...but fuck, she's family...and no one messes with my family. Another blade stabs through his other shoulder, one through each of his thighs...like an immobile Wheel of Fortune* What game should we play my little fucker? How about we remove the offending digits? hmm? The ones you used to touch my sister? *my smile is sweet, almost tender in its feral violence, taking   his hand in a slow caress, the leather shielding my skin from the touch of his, fisting his forefinger with delicate deliberation* Did you use this one? *Crack!!! the bone snaps like a twig, the knuckle protruding, his scream a melody to my ears...next finger* this one? *growling now as I repeat the question snap...his digits loose and bleeding, broken chopsticks hanging from his hands* will you ever touch a female again? *frantic head shaking, his bobble head routine impressive under the pain that scents his body a beautiful musk, wetting my lips, my fingers stroking down my thighs to the top of my boot, withdrawing the small dagger embedded there* I heard you have a piercing...*his eyes bug wide, swollen eye bulging from beneath its broken socket, face nothing but bruised and exposed bone* I like piercings...*the whisper of my voice eclipsed by the metallic hiss over the fly of his jeans* how about we remove it...slowly? *fangs glinting as I flash a wicked smile* again...will you ever touch another female? *my lips to his ear as he whimpers, blade slicing the   denim, stomach rolling at the thought of what he could have done if she hadn't been with a friend...of what he WOULD have done...purring* I'll make sure you don't...aren't I kind? *rational thought hiding in the face of my murderous temper as I set to work making good on that*

{gathering Tory's blood stained clothes from the floor, where she left them strewn the night before, stuffing them into the  black duffle bag destined for the furnace in the basement. The cocksucker who hurt Jodi got what was coming to him, but fuck if I'm going to have his reeking human scent stinking up the Penthouse. Snatching the bloody glove from the lip of the open drawer, shoving it closed...doing a double take at the sound of clinking glass...wrenching the drawer open, rifling through the black silk boxers...eyes falling on the glass vials...hypodermic needles...syringes...What The Fuck!  Brows mashed together, rolling the vials in my hands, reading the labels 'Morphine Tartrate'...gaze cutting over to Tory laying in our bed...awake...holding out the vials in my palms} You care to explain why there's enough narcotics here to floor a goddamned elephant? {my expression pleading...knowing there must be some logical explanation for this...right?}

*the dreaded clink of the vials wakes me from a dead sleep, and I curse silently as my eyes open to see you frowning at  the small bottles. My lip curls at your question. For all your smarts you can't work this shit out? But then again...when  would you even have to know about it? My response is husky and low with sleep, snarky with residual anger from the  previous night* I'm going elephant hunting...they're in season *my mind refuses to believe you have no idea why I have them*

{Biting back a growl at your flippant response... mind working through the logic}...you're no junkie Tory...I've never tasted that shit in your blood...this stuff {glancing down at the vials} this is legit...hospital dispensary merchandise...{Fuck! Brow knitted tight, a tic working over my clenched jaw} Are you ill Tory? What are you keeping from me?

*the blush flaming bright in my cheeks, a biological response to the embarrassment creeping through me, slipping from the bed, my hands flexing, uncomfortable, anger my defense against the shame* It happens every ten fucking years give or take...works females up something good...it's the reason I've been a little...moody...recently...*smirking, snatching a bottle*  these have been my best friends and most hated enemies for the past century...

{Diamond eyes flaring wide...the words coming out hoarse} Your NEEDING? These are for your needing? Fuck! But I... {raking my hands through my hair...thoughts racing...but you what Vishous?...you thought she'd want to use you? After everything HE did to her...took from her...you think she'd actually want you to sire her young? Think about it...your father was right...'do the race a favor and ensure he never procreates'...anger boiling through my veins...memories of being held down...legs spread wide...the pliars...the blinding agony...struggling to steady my voice, staring at the floor while I gather my expression into something...presentable} For your needing...ok... I get it Tory...you'll happily let me fuck your brains out but God forbid you'd actually have to bear my young ...well, you know what, Tory, you needn't have worried, true...daddy fixed me up good...or hadn't you noticed? {gloved hand moving to rest over my leathers...over my mutilated body}

*the blood rushing from my face in pure horror as your words spin a freezing blanket around my soul, all jokes pushed  aside, the sneering, pained anger on your face breaking my heart. Fuck...I never thought he'd even want to sire my young...a warrior's life was no place for babes...and by the Scribe I didn't even know if I could...the disappointment  if I didn't provide him with an heir would be worse than any torture inflicted...but my defense is never to cry...and fuck  but his words brought tears to my eyes...my fist slams in a hard arch into your jaw, my anger, my fear, my pain projected onto you, my voice hard, almost screaming* You know what?!! Fuck you!!! I got those because for the past century I was alone...no one to serve me through the fucking riot that is my needing!! It was fucking habit...and I didn't know how you  would react if I asked you to...shit!! *Backing away, my fist throbbing, the wall supporting me* I don't want to use them...

{Staggering back a step as your fist connects hard with the bones in my jaw, breath leaving my lungs on a rush, gloved hand flying up to scrub at the stubbled ache...diamond eyes boring into you as you back up against the wall...adrenaline hammering through my veins...the fight instinct roaring to life...but I don't want to fight you...I fucking love you...head hanging low on my neck as I take tentative steps towards you...arms held wide... slowly taking your bruised fist into my hands, lifting my eyes to the burning emerald fury of your gaze...voice low...defeated} I deserved that, Tory. Hit me again if it helps... Fuck! I'm destined to be a warrior... not a fucking father, true... I wouldn't know where to begin...you're right... you have every right to use the drugs...when the time comes, I'll arrange for a female nurse to serve you...I'm a fucking bastard...I'm sorry {closing my eyes against the stinging tears that threaten to spill}

*my fist raising again, not because you gave me permission but for the sheer fact that you seem to have selective hearing all of a sudden...but I can't...my hand drops, falters from the harsh swing as your tears break me, my eyes filling with sadness, a helpless desperation...unclenching my fist to lay my palm against your cheek* You would make an amazing  father, nallum...I just...I don't know if I can give you sons...I couldn't last time and it destroyed me...but I HATE  the drugs...*my voice quiets, going husky and deep with tears* I want you...to serve me...not the drugs...not a nurse...

{Opening my eyes, startled by the tenderness of your palm against my cheek, your face swimming into focus, voice cracking} I don't need sons nalla... I only need you... there is every chance I can't sire young... you've seen what they did to me, none of that matters {palms resting either side of your face, holding your gaze} I want you, Tory...I want it to be me...

*tears burning my skin with grief, the memories so close to the surface...memories of HIM...my daughter...but that was the past...over...gone, no bringing her back...denying myself your comfort...denying you your right as my hellren...I  can't do that...my hands shift down, over your heart* You will be my drug? *smiling shakily, stroking the pounding beat, my heart synchronising its rhythm to yours* cause it's soon, nallum...It's so close...

{Nodding slowly, the corners of my mouth curving up to echo your smile, my heart a hammering drumbeat against your palm, voice gravelled with emotion} Fuck yes, my shellan, I will be your drug... {burying my gloved hand into the nape of your neck, jerking your mouth to mine in a desperate, bruising kiss, goatee rasping your cheek, the scent of tears like fresh rain in the air} I love you Tory...

*the salty drops of tears mingle with the needy dance of our tongues, fear and love coursing between our bodies* I love you so fucking much. And I'm sorry I didn't tell you...I was...scared...you wouldn't want to...

{Exhaling on a ragged breath, a smile starting to form against your lips} Foolish female...how could I not? {Thumbs brushing  the tears from your cheeks, the intensity of my love burning in the black centres of my diamond eyes}

*my shoulder lifts in a shrug, my hips fusing to your lower body* I never expected you to want to risk young... *My voice trembles, lips shaping the word with a reverent sadness, like they always do* whatever happens...we deal together...

{An icy grip of fear fisting around my heart at your words...never even considered the possibility that you might actually conceive...that I could risk losing you...I...my heart accelerating to a thundering beat between my ears...NO!..shoving the thought from my mind...focussing on the here and now, you warm in my arms, afraid, needing your hellren to man up and be strong, for both of us...nodding slowly} fuck yes Tory, whatever happens...we deal together...

*the blast of frozen air that punches from your body, makes me stagger, the deadly fear written over your face a stark contrast to the warrior strength holding me tight and I know without a mirror that my face has the exact same expression, though a strange feeling tells me your fear is different from mine. My fear of possibly conceiving, of possibly losing  any young you sire...of not being strong enough to fight my way out of the spiral of tormenting grief that broke my soul the first time around. Steeling my nerves, I have to be the female you mated...hardened to any pain* always together...*picking up the bag of tiny vials that was discarded...when I punched you? and shaking them* Havers will want these back...*my sadness giving way to a cheeky evil glint in the tear shimmering emerald of my eyes* maybe I should take them personally? *capturing your mouth, welding our bodies for the briefest of moments as I devour you* I'll be back soon...

{returning the kiss with a fierce possession} hurry back to me nalla. And go easy on the doc, true. His jaw's not as strong as mine, feel me? {holding you flush against me for a moment longer, inhaling my scent on your hair} Later Tory...

*chuckling, my lips feathering over your jaw* I want to return these...no BFG  *winking as I dematerialize with the vials*