Thursday 5 May 2011

Cruel Obsession



*my dreams give me freedom, the ability to move, to fight, to hide in my hellren's embrace and just breathe properly, to relax, to live...the chains in this particular dream grow lax, are unfastened from their wall brackets and my body sighs a full muscle sigh of relief moving of its own accord for the door...yes, please....finally get me out of this hell hole...the links tighten, my arms wrenched behind my back, the saccharine scent of evil permeating my dreams and yanking me firmly into full awareness...shit...how the fuck do you sleep through something like that...being moved? God, my exhaustion got the better of me...the young practicing its kickboxing in my stomach a kinder alarm than the lash of a whip but no less disorienting to sleep while you are awake...emeralds fly wide in horror, my senses assaulted by a scent I only ever find in my nightmares...kicking out, brain briefly registering that the lessers can SEE me, my shoulders dislocating on a groan and popping out of their sockets, chains releasing into my hands as the lessers struggle to hold onto the terror that twists my body into a flurry of broken bones and iron punches, the chains slamming skull into brain and gouging oily gashes through their disgusting bodies...


I will not go through that door...I will not go through that door...the fight that storms my body short circuits, muscles spasming, one word hissing from my lips in fear* Meggy...*his looming humanoid shadow beckons with a finger and my chains obey, arms jacked out to the sides, legs kicking in a useless struggle to gain control, hovering feet off the ground, a floating crucifix that steals my breath, shuts down my brain and locks me in the past with the laughter of the devil and my own begging screams. The room is similar...same metal rack in the centre stained with...everything…female blood, civilian blood…that and…sex…my stomach does a vicious somersault…no no no…lessers are impotent, lessers are impotent, over and over my brain spits out this little snippet of factual nothing….then realisation dawning…but the Omega isn’t…far as I know he works just fine…breath sawing in my chest as I once again struggle fiercely with the chains, a wild animal wrestling for freedom through blood and pain, wrists mangled to muscle by the metal teeth…I would rather chew my own goddamned hands off than ever submit to THAT!!


Drugs or no drugs, I won’t, I can’t…not again, never again…no one…no one but my male…oh fuck, my young wouldn’t survive again…it’s happening…fucking history, leave me alone…please don’t take my baby…the words no longer in my head, they scream from my lungs in terror, pure and desolate…giving in to the feminine fear I usually suppress and screaming until my voice is a hoarse nothing of horror, my body a bruised, broken, weakening shell, barely enough protection for my young, my blood needs left unmet for far too long, no matter how much they feed me…I don’t have what my body needs, what my soul needs…my hellren…and as the Omega's hand descends on the usually active round of my stomach, my young falls still...quivering in the depths of my body in a futile attempt to hide...the circles of his touch cause my gorge to rise in a retch of bile and abhorrence, restrained, unable to shield it from such an insidious creeping evil...do nothing but observe...*<<mmm...my own personal work of art...I'm going to enjoy watching you grow...kick...such life...how I long to take it from you>>*his inky existence warps the room in his oily touch on my stomach, his presence oppressing me, his hands obsessed with the now frantically kicking life, body naught but an incubator to him....my tears fall screaming*

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